Personality check

Next in this series: “How to make stuff seem to be not about yourself by replacing ‘I’ with ‘you’”

It’s strange how you can lose sight of being yourself in everyday life.

You work, eat, sleep, get drunk, occasionally sleep with other people, but more often just wish you could sleep alone, and repeat. Your Spotify playlists combine Drake and The Eagles, “Passionfruit” and “Life in the Fast Lane” back to back.

You don’t care about working out, but spend a lot of time in front of the mirror every day to fix your hair. Your routine involves working from 8pm to 8am, then realising you have a meeting at noon.

You feel like being in a relationship wouldn’t work for you at this point and that you need space, but also feel lonely whenever you’re not around your friends. Your friends include people in their mid thirties that haven’t figured out that much more stuff than you, but seem infinitely more satisfied with that fact.

You eat healthy, but your alcohol use (and adjoined fast food habits) and constant sleep deprivation totally undermine any positive effects that might have on your health. Your dentist always tells you your teeth are in perfect shape, making you wonder how in the holy heavens that is possible.

You constantly wonder who you are or how much you know about what being you actually means. Your 250-word story on Medium doesn’t answer that question one bit, but does give you something new to tweet about three times over the next week.